Free From Hell

Free From Hell:

'via Blog this'

Saw this on Anderson... He had 2 addicts on his show today and of course there were some recovering addicts in the audience. One of them started this website and I think it provides a great support system for addicts and users in need of some help.

Not just for the addicts, but friends & family members as well.

Check it out!

Michellei in the hospital...

So Jesse took Michellei to the hospital a few hours ago... around 8am.
Im hoping she's in labor. Shes 2 days overdue, 1cm dilated and Im ready to meet my nephew.
Ethan Tilino Gray.
Mom is on her way to the hospital now and Im waiting on an update!!! Eeeek.. I remember being in her shoes only 3 short months ago. But its all worth it in the end.
Steve's going to take half a day off to be there for Jesse and I think that's really sweet of him. Not all of us have been getting along as we should, so Im glad that things are at least moving towards the better.

Updates to come...

its 10:30am and they sent her home. Im sure she's pissed. I know I was after being sent home twice!! Mom says Jesse's been up since 3am drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. He has to be all nerves at this point. I called him and told him Id be there for them if they wanted me to. I even got Maddie's bag ready if we have to leave fast. Now we just need the baby to come. If she doesn't deliver by this coming Monday, then they'll induce her.

3:30pm and she's still at home. Not too sure what all is going on right now. I told Nanny to call me if she heard anything. I just cant help but be anxious for them right now. I know what they're going through and it can be scary... no matter how prepared you think you are.
They've got a lot coming their way and I really hope Jesse's going to step up. That baby deserves the best, not the bare minimum someone is hardly willing to do for him. There is nothing more important that your child and providing for him or her as best you can. Okay, off my soapbox I come.

Class

I love this. Plain and simple. 

Panic Attack

Had a panic attack this morning. Nothing seemed to trigger it. I was just sitting on the ottoman, playing with Maddie on her floor mat. Thats when I felt the heat. It crept up my back and over my shoulders. My heart was pounding and I started pouring sweat. I took my medicine but it takes time to work. Good thing Maddie was content playing so I could focus on not flipping out in front of her. (worst fear, btw... having an anxiety attack alone with Maddie) I sat with my head between my legs and just breathed as best I could. Id say it lasted about 15 minutes start to finish.
I had a lot cleaning and little things planned to get done today, but now Im totally exhausted. Maybe a shower & a nap will help. Now if only Maddie would go to sleep... I could get started.

All over the place

     I sit back and look on these past 3 months, and I cant believe how big she is. How alert and happy she is. Shes grabbing onto things, especially my hands when I feed her. I love how she holds my finger. Melts my heart.
     Shes also started rolling onto her side. I caught it on tape the very first time. It was awesome. And of course she talks all the time. And when she cant get it out, she gets really frustrated. Its really cute. But of course I think its cute... she's MY baby.
     Her Monkey is becoming her very good friend and she smiles real big when she sees him. Here's a few pictures of her and Monkey Man a few nights ago...

 

And here's an older picture....

This was the 2nd smile I caught on camera when she was 6 weeks old.   :)    She's growing so fast and only wearing her cute outfits a few times before they're too small. Its all going by so fast and Im so happy to be able to stay at home everyday to be with her.
     I dread the day I have to put her in daycare. I know how she's best taken care of, because I do it all day everyday. I know how she likes to be held while she eats. I know what each different cry means and can soothe her almost right away. Who can say that a stranger at a daycare would be able to do the same thing? Two words: Nanny Cam.
     I know Im crazy and I always think the worst is going to happen in almost any situation. One of my biggest faults. And its definitely something I dont want Maddie to learn from me. I want her to be optimistic and upbeat about life and all it has to offer. Lead by example I guess.
     Right now she's in one of her favorite places... her swing. Snoring... just like Daddy. For some reason her snoring doesn't bother me like Steve or Bubba's. ;)
     I just wanna grab her up and snuggle her, but she's not really the cuddling type anymore. I dont know what's up with that. I wont always be able to hold her the way I do now and it makes me sad when she gets frustrated in my arms. No matter what position I hold her, its not always good enough. This does give her the freedom to roll around on her play mat, and kick at her toys above her head.
     Since she's sleeping, now's the time to get some cleaning done.

Meg

   

Aveeno is the best!

Maddie has been having some skin troubles the past month or so. 

First, we went through a bout of Ringworm on her legs. It was awful. I felt so bad for her. How could MY daughter get ringworm... on her legs? WTF right? Well, the doctor said that sometimes it just happens. Didn't give me any comfort because I knew she had to be uncomfortable. 

We started treatment (Ketaconazole) for the Ringworm and Dr. Mody pointed out   

some Eczema on her arms and stomach. I had been using Aveeno Calming Lotion everyday and after baths of course. But it just didn't seem to help. 

I did some research and found this lotion. I have used it only 4 times

on her legs and now they are soooo smooth. I am definitely a believer, and we will be using this everyday!

Thanks Aveeno!!