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| To all my friends who have been there for me through everything! |
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| If you can't read it, PLEASE zoom in because its hilarious! |
Of course these are all courtesy of my Baby Center Ladies!!!
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Addicted to Memes
Cost Of Raising A Child
Total cost: $231,170
Expenses from birth until age 18, including $78,380 for public college
I found this article on Baby Center. You just enter in your marital status, approximate income, and if you plan to pay for a private or public college, and viola'!
I just thought it was interesting to see what type of money we were looking at spending. Needless to say, it will not be cheap or easy. But all I can say, is that it will be worth every single penny.
Some of the numbers could skewed somewhat. For instance, we have gotten tons of
hand me down clothes and have only bought a few outfits here and there... pretty
much the ones I thought Maddie just couldn't live without! Healthcare wise, Maddie
is on Steve's insurance, and for the two of them its $200/month, so that's slightly
underestimated. But this definitely gives you a rough estimate of what you'd spend
the first year of your little one's life.
I sent this info to J & M in hopes that they would see what it really takes to provide for a baby.
But as usual, I get 0 response.
"You cant change people, who aren't willing to change"
"You cant change people, who aren't willing to change"
"You cant change people, who aren't willing to change"
I need to pull a Bart Simpson and write ^that^ on a chalk board about 50,000 times! Then maybe, just maybe, I'll learn to stop trying to help people.
But here I go, getting off topic! So I'll stop here. Hope this post was helpful to any parents who read my extremely boring blog!!!
Woman allegedly texting while driving with infant on lap arrested in Torrance - LA Daily News
Woman allegedly texting while driving with infant on lap arrested in Torrance - LA Daily News:
Absolutely unacceptable. And that shirt she's wearing? WTF.
Its people like her that make me loose my faith in humanity day by day.
My best friend in middle school had 2 older sisters. By the time we were 13, her oldest sister had a baby, Emily. My friends mom would drive around in her van, baby in her lap. It blew my mind and I hated to ever ride with her.
This woman deserves to lose her children in my opinion. Place them with other family members of foster care, with people who will love, care for them, and keep them safe.
Absolutely unacceptable. And that shirt she's wearing? WTF.
Its people like her that make me loose my faith in humanity day by day.
My best friend in middle school had 2 older sisters. By the time we were 13, her oldest sister had a baby, Emily. My friends mom would drive around in her van, baby in her lap. It blew my mind and I hated to ever ride with her.
This woman deserves to lose her children in my opinion. Place them with other family members of foster care, with people who will love, care for them, and keep them safe.
Crazy Dreams & Plans for the day
I always have some crazy, effed up dreams.
The only part of my dreams that I remember from last night.... involved a wreck.
2 trailers. Not tractor-trailers, but 2 single wide trailer homes were going down the street, with a pick-up right behind. The first trailer slammed on breaks, in turn having the 2nd one slam and smush completely into the first, making the pick-up truck push both trailers down the street. Funny thing was, all occupants popped right out and started walking down the street. But I wasnt seeing this out of my current living room window, but my Mom's house window.
Crazy stuff I tell ya'. I am always having crazy dreams.
Another one from last week, was about a girl Im not particularly fond of. We will call her 5. Well, 5 was wanting to be my friend and get closer to me and my husband. Im not stupid and could see right past her fake facade... in my dream she was every where I was, begging for my friendship, doting on MY husband. After a while, I couldn't take anymore, so I beat her ass. I woke up so angry. I mean, I was angry for a few hours after waking up. That definitely isn't healthy.
.....................................
Today, Im going to try and take my drug test again. After the total catastrophe from yesterday, I am NOT looking forward to going. I am glad that Jenn is going to watch Maddie so I dont have that stress along with trying to find this place. (Steve gave me great directions, but it doesnt change the fact that I am directionally challenged.) Jenn is super excited to watch her and that makes me really happy.
......................................
I have yet to find another daycare, or option for Maddie while Laura gets her infraction corrected. I am so nervous and bothered by the whole thing, that Im stressing out even more. Right when I was getting comfortable with Laura, I have to up and find someone else to care for my precious darling girl. Ive contacted a few other in-home day cares that Im going to tour today and tomorrow (if they're open) and at least have a backup until Laura is up and running again. Wish me luck!!!
If only we could just win the lottery, we wouldnt have to worry about anything!
Only in my dreams, right?
The only part of my dreams that I remember from last night.... involved a wreck.
2 trailers. Not tractor-trailers, but 2 single wide trailer homes were going down the street, with a pick-up right behind. The first trailer slammed on breaks, in turn having the 2nd one slam and smush completely into the first, making the pick-up truck push both trailers down the street. Funny thing was, all occupants popped right out and started walking down the street. But I wasnt seeing this out of my current living room window, but my Mom's house window.
Crazy stuff I tell ya'. I am always having crazy dreams.
Another one from last week, was about a girl Im not particularly fond of. We will call her 5. Well, 5 was wanting to be my friend and get closer to me and my husband. Im not stupid and could see right past her fake facade... in my dream she was every where I was, begging for my friendship, doting on MY husband. After a while, I couldn't take anymore, so I beat her ass. I woke up so angry. I mean, I was angry for a few hours after waking up. That definitely isn't healthy.
.....................................
Today, Im going to try and take my drug test again. After the total catastrophe from yesterday, I am NOT looking forward to going. I am glad that Jenn is going to watch Maddie so I dont have that stress along with trying to find this place. (Steve gave me great directions, but it doesnt change the fact that I am directionally challenged.) Jenn is super excited to watch her and that makes me really happy.
......................................
I have yet to find another daycare, or option for Maddie while Laura gets her infraction corrected. I am so nervous and bothered by the whole thing, that Im stressing out even more. Right when I was getting comfortable with Laura, I have to up and find someone else to care for my precious darling girl. Ive contacted a few other in-home day cares that Im going to tour today and tomorrow (if they're open) and at least have a backup until Laura is up and running again. Wish me luck!!!
If only we could just win the lottery, we wouldnt have to worry about anything!
Only in my dreams, right?
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Flowers
Took these pictures of a vase of flowers Dana has had for over 2 weeks now, from Kristina They looked so artsy so I just had to take a snapshot. I am in no way a professional at taking pics, lighting, etc. but I thought it was beautiful. Id love to take some photography classes to broaden my skills, but that will just have to wait.
Hit After Hit
I leave after 1 or so, to go take my drug test. Of course it's all the way across town, off WT Harris Blvd. I had an idea of where it was, but wrote down MapQuest directions just to be safe.
Almost halfway there, I realized I left the paperwork they'd need. So Dana met me at the Target so I wouldn't have to drive all the way back home. As Im driving, I feel that I may have missed the building, so I call the office. She tells me to turn around. So I did, but I knew this wasn't the right way to go. Im extremely frustrated at this point. Maddie is screaming in the backseat because she's hungry and wont take a cold bottle.
Then I get an email from my new manager to plan on starting the 16th, instead of the 9th. No problem. So I call Laura to let her know Maddie wouldn't be starting at her daycare until then, and she drops a huge bomb on me.
She got a surprise visit from the state and they have shut her down. There is a hairline crack in the retaining wall in the back yard. So that's why. Its going to cost $3k to fix it and they just dont have the money. She may rent an apartment temporarily, while its getting fixed and inspected. Talk about a huge blow. I am so devastated. I was so excited that Maddie would be with someone like her, and now that might not be a possibility. I am feeling defeated to say the least :(
Found this Meme on babycenter and it fits my day perfectly...
Almost halfway there, I realized I left the paperwork they'd need. So Dana met me at the Target so I wouldn't have to drive all the way back home. As Im driving, I feel that I may have missed the building, so I call the office. She tells me to turn around. So I did, but I knew this wasn't the right way to go. Im extremely frustrated at this point. Maddie is screaming in the backseat because she's hungry and wont take a cold bottle.
Then I get an email from my new manager to plan on starting the 16th, instead of the 9th. No problem. So I call Laura to let her know Maddie wouldn't be starting at her daycare until then, and she drops a huge bomb on me.
She got a surprise visit from the state and they have shut her down. There is a hairline crack in the retaining wall in the back yard. So that's why. Its going to cost $3k to fix it and they just dont have the money. She may rent an apartment temporarily, while its getting fixed and inspected. Talk about a huge blow. I am so devastated. I was so excited that Maddie would be with someone like her, and now that might not be a possibility. I am feeling defeated to say the least :(
Found this Meme on babycenter and it fits my day perfectly...
Oh so true!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Im fooling myself
Venting. Don't care who reads it, doesn't read it, or cares what I have to say.
We (Me, Steve & Maddie) live with the in-laws, as anyone who actually reads my extremely boring blog knows. Taylor is Steve's (my husband) cousin. She was placed with Steve's parents when she was less than 2 years old from her dead beat, alcoholic mother. Steve's parents have provided absolutely everything for her. Other than the necessities ... Clothes, shoes, lap top, Wii, dvds, games, rides to her friends house.. you know, all the things parents do.. etc. She even has a really cute room. Well, it'd be cute if she kept it clean. She is a complete slob. I mean, I remember being messy as a teenager. But there is a difference between messy and dirty. So I can understand why she is the way she is.
That being said, I want to help her. I have tried to help her (notice a recurring theme in my posts... wanting to help people be better...) Obviously this is not working to my advantage.
She is blatantly disrespectful to every member of her family, including me. This sucks, because all I've ever wanted for her is the best. I try to teach her personal hygiene. How to apply the most subtle of make up, (she's going into high school next year, and I worry about how it will go.) And how to do her hair.
I let her borrow my curlers. What does she do? Leave them in the foyer. On the floor. Scattered around. What if one of the 6 dogs we have got into them and had to have surgery? So I no longer let her borrow them.
She let me have her pink Rainbow sandals, because they were too small for her... yet she asks to borrow them all the time. I don't believe in "Indian Giving" so I don't give in. I did let her wear them this past weekend, when we went to the mall. ((One thing about Rainbows... is that they mold to your feet, and anyone else who wears them, won't be comfortable)) She didn't care. But I did. She's not the cleanest person by any means... and I almost don't even want to put them back on my feet. I originally planned to dye them green when she gave them to me... so hopefully that'll deter her from asking to wear them.
I know most people would just say to mind my own business when it comes to other peoples kids... but I saw screw you. I see a lost little girl. A little girl who knows her birth mother didn't care enough about her to take care of her. Dana has told me stories and one that stuck out was when a neighbor saw Taylor through the living room window. Screaming at the top of her lungs in her crib. No one was home. No one. For hours. It literally breaks my heart. This poor girl must think that no one wants her.
Dont get me wrong. Steve's parents aren't mean to her, nor do they give her outrageous tasks. Her main chores are:
We (Me, Steve & Maddie) live with the in-laws, as anyone who actually reads my extremely boring blog knows. Taylor is Steve's (my husband) cousin. She was placed with Steve's parents when she was less than 2 years old from her dead beat, alcoholic mother. Steve's parents have provided absolutely everything for her. Other than the necessities ... Clothes, shoes, lap top, Wii, dvds, games, rides to her friends house.. you know, all the things parents do.. etc. She even has a really cute room. Well, it'd be cute if she kept it clean. She is a complete slob. I mean, I remember being messy as a teenager. But there is a difference between messy and dirty. So I can understand why she is the way she is.
That being said, I want to help her. I have tried to help her (notice a recurring theme in my posts... wanting to help people be better...) Obviously this is not working to my advantage.
She is blatantly disrespectful to every member of her family, including me. This sucks, because all I've ever wanted for her is the best. I try to teach her personal hygiene. How to apply the most subtle of make up, (she's going into high school next year, and I worry about how it will go.) And how to do her hair.
I let her borrow my curlers. What does she do? Leave them in the foyer. On the floor. Scattered around. What if one of the 6 dogs we have got into them and had to have surgery? So I no longer let her borrow them.
She let me have her pink Rainbow sandals, because they were too small for her... yet she asks to borrow them all the time. I don't believe in "Indian Giving" so I don't give in. I did let her wear them this past weekend, when we went to the mall. ((One thing about Rainbows... is that they mold to your feet, and anyone else who wears them, won't be comfortable)) She didn't care. But I did. She's not the cleanest person by any means... and I almost don't even want to put them back on my feet. I originally planned to dye them green when she gave them to me... so hopefully that'll deter her from asking to wear them.
I know most people would just say to mind my own business when it comes to other peoples kids... but I saw screw you. I see a lost little girl. A little girl who knows her birth mother didn't care enough about her to take care of her. Dana has told me stories and one that stuck out was when a neighbor saw Taylor through the living room window. Screaming at the top of her lungs in her crib. No one was home. No one. For hours. It literally breaks my heart. This poor girl must think that no one wants her.
Dont get me wrong. Steve's parents aren't mean to her, nor do they give her outrageous tasks. Her main chores are:
- Clean the dishes each night
- Keep her room clean (which her parents never check)
- And occassionally let the dogs out, feed & water them (they have automatic feeders.. so she only has to fill them up every few days)
That's it. But she complains. Yes, I know this is what teenagers do... but I guess living in it makes it that much more stressful and more intense than if we didn't live here.
I feel for her. I can only imagine how I would feel if my Mother wasn't fit to take care of me. Making me live with another relative. Im sure she has a huge amount of resentment towards Dana, as well as her birth mother, Debbie. I think this whole situation makes me want to get that much closer to her. But she just pushes me away. I just want to help her. To guide her. To make sure she's doing all she needs to be an amazing person of society. But all of my love, care, devotion (just like Jesse & Michellei) falls on deaf ears.
I guess I just need to let go. To let go of wanting to help others.
To let go of wanting the best for the people in my life.
To let go of hoping she will one day come around.
It just breaks my heart (seems a lot of things break my heart these days... not healthy)
I'd post this on babycenter, in hopes of getting comments and support, but I have this niggling feeling that I would only get blasted for even sticking my nose in their business. But that's the thing right there.. they make it my business.
Okay... I've had a little too much wine and Ive got a little more to talk about... so on to the next post.
♥ Meg
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